Wednesday, May 25, 2005
The following conversation is... |11:20 AM| The following conversation is for Dell internal use only.
Cecil says:
ALright. When do you want to grab some....grub, Bub?
Calfee says:
well it doesn't open for 10 more mins
Calfee says:
so 10 more mins
Cecil says:
Perhaps I will find a shrub to rub, after which I will wash the sap off in a tub, in which the water goes glub, then we can drink at the pub.
Calfee says:
then i can stub
Calfee says:
my foot up your a*s
Cecil says:
Join the club.
Calfee says:
listen bub, don't make me beat you with a radish bulb
Calfee says:
followed by a billy club
Cecil says:
Your attacks you will surely flub, you're nothing but a scrub.
(0) comments
Idiocy in many forms |11:11 AM| You may or may not have heard about this yet, but two jackasses got themselves sent to the hospital by trying to make lightsabers.
This has to be a goddamn hoax. They had to be doing something else, or lied to police or something.
It says
Gasoline? Kerosene? Zippo Lighter fluid? Whatever it was, these people were fucking idiots. Back when I was 12, I knew better than to fuck around with gasoline. I wore gloves and goggles, even when I was accidently blowing up my yard. So how old were these jokers?
20 FUCKING YEARS OLD? And he's pouring FUEL into a GLASS TUBE? This had to be scam to get into that chick's pants. I wonder if he filmed it?
I'll bet the first thought in his head as he was being blown up and set on fire, (That is after the "AAAAH OH SHIT I'M ON FIRE") was "Oh man, now that chick will never have sex with me!".
Protip: Setting yourself on fire rarely "gets the babes". This goes double for setting previously mentioned babes on fire as well.
(0) comments
Sunday, May 22, 2005
Plastic Pride |10:23 PM| So I was at that Bastion of conspicuous consumerism the other day, Walmart, trying to find new deer warning whistles.
I took a look at the action figure aisle, in the star wars section, and it had been ravaged by shoppers. I managed to find a figure I'd been looking for, this Clone Commander:
There were a big pile of clone pilots and a couple other characters, clearly not in as big demand as other characters. There were some lesser known characters, and variants of the main characters. The one I noticed the most of though, was poor Jimmy Smits, playing Senator Bail Organa.
While not the most main character, he certainly had more screen time than say, the Trade Federation things. I guess his figure just wasn't exciting enough.
How depressing for that actor, if he ever visits Walmart.
If I'm ever in a movie/TV series, and there's action figures made, and I'm not a main character, I'm going to put a stipulation in the contract that my figure is "short packed" or made artificially rare. That way the sad sacks of meat that desire complete collections will be desperate to find the tiny plastic avatar of me.
(0) comments
The following conversation is... |11:20 AM| The following conversation is for Dell internal use only.
Cecil says:
ALright. When do you want to grab some....grub, Bub?
Calfee says:
well it doesn't open for 10 more mins
Calfee says:
so 10 more mins
Cecil says:
Perhaps I will find a shrub to rub, after which I will wash the sap off in a tub, in which the water goes glub, then we can drink at the pub.
Calfee says:
then i can stub
Calfee says:
my foot up your a*s
Cecil says:
Join the club.
Calfee says:
listen bub, don't make me beat you with a radish bulb
Calfee says:
followed by a billy club
Cecil says:
Your attacks you will surely flub, you're nothing but a scrub.
(0) comments
Idiocy in many forms |11:11 AM| You may or may not have heard about this yet, but two jackasses got themselves sent to the hospital by trying to make lightsabers.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20050525/ap_en_mo/star_wars_sabers
This has to be a goddamn hoax. They had to be doing something else, or lied to police or something.
It says
Two "Star Wars" fans were critically injured when they tried to replicate the light sabers used in the movie by filling glass fluorescent light tubes with fuel, police and a news report said Tuesday.
Gasoline? Kerosene? Zippo Lighter fluid? Whatever it was, these people were fucking idiots. Back when I was 12, I knew better than to fuck around with gasoline. I wore gloves and goggles, even when I was accidently blowing up my yard. So how old were these jokers?
The pair, Mark Webb, 20, and an unidentified 17-year-old girl,
20 FUCKING YEARS OLD? And he's pouring FUEL into a GLASS TUBE? This had to be scam to get into that chick's pants. I wonder if he filmed it?
I'll bet the first thought in his head as he was being blown up and set on fire, (That is after the "AAAAH OH SHIT I'M ON FIRE") was "Oh man, now that chick will never have sex with me!".
Protip: Setting yourself on fire rarely "gets the babes". This goes double for setting previously mentioned babes on fire as well.
(0) comments
Sunday, May 22, 2005
Plastic Pride |10:23 PM| So I was at that Bastion of conspicuous consumerism the other day, Walmart, trying to find new deer warning whistles.
I took a look at the action figure aisle, in the star wars section, and it had been ravaged by shoppers. I managed to find a figure I'd been looking for, this Clone Commander:
There were a big pile of clone pilots and a couple other characters, clearly not in as big demand as other characters. There were some lesser known characters, and variants of the main characters. The one I noticed the most of though, was poor Jimmy Smits, playing Senator Bail Organa.
While not the most main character, he certainly had more screen time than say, the Trade Federation things. I guess his figure just wasn't exciting enough.
How depressing for that actor, if he ever visits Walmart.
If I'm ever in a movie/TV series, and there's action figures made, and I'm not a main character, I'm going to put a stipulation in the contract that my figure is "short packed" or made artificially rare. That way the sad sacks of meat that desire complete collections will be desperate to find the tiny plastic avatar of me.
(0) comments
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