Kick in the ass. |2:28 PM|
I was at a relatively stupid low point yesterday. When I came into work, I was ten minutes late, I hadn't shaven in a week or more, I still stank at close range from lack of deoderant. I hadn't gotten any paperwork/bills/anything done for the last several weeks. I really had stop caring or getting anything accomplished. I was down to less than one meal a day, and I couldn't remember the last time I worked out in the gym. I realized all this while I was trying to take a leak, and the anger it caused in me was bad enough where I couldn't piss.
This was indeed painful.
After I calmed down a bit, I managed to go back to work, check my finances, re-submit the tax info, re-send the T-shirt order (one more time) as well as get some other needed shit done. I may have falled relatively far, but I'm getting back into line. Man, it was a drag.
But, I'm doing a lot better. I guess a mental kick in the ass was helpful enough. It was still tremendously stupid, though.
On a different note LadeeLeroy is going out of town to see her brother. I wish them both the best. I bring her up because she and I live in the same town for the moment (Austin, Texas for those not paying attention) and we discussed earlier what would happen if either of us noticed the other one at a popular hang out spot. It helps that we apparently frequent the same movie theaters/food distrubution buildings. Though I won't reveal the special signals, codewords, or hand signals, we've got it worked out so that the situation is not totally goddamn dorky. I don't think it will come down to us actually running into each other, as that remains highly unlikely.
May contain citric acid to adjust Ph. |8:40 AM|
I noticed that the woman I linked to yesterday showed up on this site. I was looking through referral logs for goofy google hits and saw footprints from another site tracker. Guess she noticed the weird site from which she was getting traffic.
I decided while I was in the shower that if you try to greet every situation without expectations, your ability to observe and learn from said experience will be greatly improved in a majority of cases. This applies to a lot of things, from movies to a new person you just met at a party. I've stopped reading the backs of books I'm going to read, and I've decided I'm not going to read past the star rating/thumb rating/whatever scale in movie reviews. I might read the review later to see what someone else thought, but I don't want to know much beyond "Is this movie crap?". A movie review for me at this point could be scaled down to quality of movie, and target audience. "Crappy movie. Target audience 15-26 year old males who enjoy watching things explode" or "Great movie, target audience 30-45 year old housewives who have long arms".
Okay, maybe the genre of the film would help.
This is more geared towards entertainment and education, but it can apply to other situations, like tasting a new food, or bungee jumping. All I really knew about nipple piercing is that it would hurt a great deal. I didn't know much of the other information involved. That includes the interesting stuff, as well as the "oh man, I leaned over to put my gate key in the slot at my apartment complex and my seatbelt scraped across my chest. I HOWLED!"
In case you're wondering, what triggered this was the recent reading of these Palahniuk novels. Nothing author specific, (except for his work being really, really unusual) just that I didn't know the basic plotline of the books at all, and I think I got signifigantly more suprise and "wonder" out of them. Last night, while reading "Invisible Monsters" I actually emitted an involantary "whoa" when I read a particular passage.
Well, back to work.
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Tuesday, July 30, 2002
Grateful Books |12:54 PM|
I really, really intend to read less fiction. But then I discover a new damn author. Suddenly, it's all whirlwind romance, late nights in cars, quiet moments at work, and yet another 3 pounds of paper to box up and move when it's time to leave my domicile.
I'm currently reading "Invisible Monsters" by Chuck Palahniuk, following up on his "Survivor". The guy has some sort of weird fascination with injecting female hormones into guys. Especially buff guys.
Someone sent me a couple links to cos play sites. I thought this would be a good person to "save" from cam whoredom, as a sort of personal crusade. I told Vid that I was declaring idealogical war against cam girls. Anyone allowed on the TPL cam portal was not allowed to show skin. Sadly, I think it is neither my place to judge, nor in my power to save, people who are just screwing around on the internet.
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Monday, July 29, 2002
Tremendous Hair |2:33 PM|
I decided last night, while I was trying to sleep, that I need to turn over a new leaf. I wanted to become more responsible, as responsible and reliable as I had been in the past. I don't know when or how I lost the habits, but I did. So I got up early, planned my day, and got to jiffy lube to get my oil changed. While I was there, I filled out job apps I've been meaning to complete. Later, I planned on breakfast.
At one point on the app, it wanted a driver's license number, reaching to my back pocket I realized I had left my wallet at home.
Shit.
I had to leave my cell phone as collateral, drove back home, got the wallet, drove back to pay, then sped off to work. I went from 15 minutes early to 15 minutes late. Kaboom. There goes that plan. I'm doing my best to salvage today as a "new start", so perhaps I'll do something remarkable later.
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Someone was giving me crap about that image earlier this evening. The story behind it is, I was visiting this woman, and she was looking at a digital camera of mine. Unfortunately, the batteries in that camera were utter crap. So when this woman began firing the camera just into her nose over and over again, I overreacted and made a quick grab for the camera.
Sadly, I missed, or didn't, or it doesn't matter anyway. Because my fist continued to travel until it smashed directly into my testicles. I rolled around on the ground for a little while, and a picture was taken. The shoes in the doorway are those of a guy I drove with for quite some time.
That trip was what made me decide I hated long drives in Jeeps. I always realized some damned important things, only a couple of which have since been proven wrong/misguided.
Hmmm. I still own the shoes I'm wearing in that picture.
I'm sitting here, sunday night, with a couple tasks laid out in front of me. I'm thinking I'm going to get some sleep, and deal with them at 6am. Goodnight.
That sun fresh feeling |6:15 AM|
Christ, I should have stayed in Saturday night. I went to a party with Vorpal, he'd informed me that it might be fun. It was crap. Utter crap. I actually called Vorpal's cell phone and then hung up, so that his phone would ring in front of other people. Vorpal feighned answering a call, and acted as though he was talking to someone who needed us to leave the party. We departed as quickly as possible.
Christ, when you show up and the most exciting thing that is going on is a poorly translated japanese game on the PS2, something is seriously wrong. Maybe that party's mother drank while pregnant. I dunno.
I'm unhappy that beards continue to grow even when you are awake for extended periods of time. The damn things should wait until I'm asleep, dammit. I shouldn't have to shave more than once in the same waking period.
