Wednesday, April 05, 2006
This incomplete ranting about love. |12:53 PM| I rained on a friend's parade last night, or so he declared. All I told him was something I learned/decided a while back, after having my emotional, metaphorical, ass handed to me. True, it was all my fault, so that's why I tried to learn as much about it as possible.
Love, as in the love one feels for another, is not actually love until it is shared, or reciprocated. The deepest, burn-to-the-core love one person may feel for another is closer to madness or obsession than actual love, if the object of these emotions does not feel something similar in return.
I'm defining the word love dynamically, so I'll let context clues guide any reader as to the implied definition.
As someone who has been in love, in a variety of ways, to a vast range of magnitudes, as well as being someone that other people have loved, I feel as though I have some tiny insight into this subject. This, I'm sure, is not some radical new idea, nor do I think it applies to all emotional states people would classify as love.
I have loved people who loved me back, people who did not love me back, people who at some periods did love me, but then did not, people who did not share the same magnitude of emotion that I did, people who felt far more love for me than I had for them, and then there were the folks who were in love with me when I wasn't in love with them, only to not be in love with me when I felt it for them. I've had my fair share of folks who had apparently fallen deeply in love with me, while I remained oblivious, or confused and troubled. I know I too, have confused and bothered folks. Eh, it's a learning experience.
In a way, it is unfair to a person to admit this deep emotional bond you feel that you have to them, if it turns out they don't share it. It can ruin friendships, or at least damage them. This is assuming you're not even a crazy person who scares the bejesus of the target of your love in the first place. But then again, if they are interested, well, that's just swell. Here's a tip, be sure about their intentions before you start writing epic poems in their honor.
I wanted to call this idea, of love not being love unless it is reciprocated, the "A death in Venice" rule, but I haven't read that so I can't be sure. I just call it the "Cecil shouldn't be a nutjob" rule.
This incomplete ranting about love. |12:53 PM| I rained on a friend's parade last night, or so he declared. All I told him was something I learned/decided a while back, after having my emotional, metaphorical, ass handed to me. True, it was all my fault, so that's why I tried to learn as much about it as possible.
Love, as in the love one feels for another, is not actually love until it is shared, or reciprocated. The deepest, burn-to-the-core love one person may feel for another is closer to madness or obsession than actual love, if the object of these emotions does not feel something similar in return.
I'm defining the word love dynamically, so I'll let context clues guide any reader as to the implied definition.
As someone who has been in love, in a variety of ways, to a vast range of magnitudes, as well as being someone that other people have loved, I feel as though I have some tiny insight into this subject. This, I'm sure, is not some radical new idea, nor do I think it applies to all emotional states people would classify as love.
I have loved people who loved me back, people who did not love me back, people who at some periods did love me, but then did not, people who did not share the same magnitude of emotion that I did, people who felt far more love for me than I had for them, and then there were the folks who were in love with me when I wasn't in love with them, only to not be in love with me when I felt it for them. I've had my fair share of folks who had apparently fallen deeply in love with me, while I remained oblivious, or confused and troubled. I know I too, have confused and bothered folks. Eh, it's a learning experience.
In a way, it is unfair to a person to admit this deep emotional bond you feel that you have to them, if it turns out they don't share it. It can ruin friendships, or at least damage them. This is assuming you're not even a crazy person who scares the bejesus of the target of your love in the first place. But then again, if they are interested, well, that's just swell. Here's a tip, be sure about their intentions before you start writing epic poems in their honor.
I wanted to call this idea, of love not being love unless it is reciprocated, the "A death in Venice" rule, but I haven't read that so I can't be sure. I just call it the "Cecil shouldn't be a nutjob" rule.
1 Comments:
"and then there were the folks who were in love with me when I wasn't in love with them"
I HATE those people. You have to pretend you are disinterested to get them to like you, and thats a lot of work.
So where is my epic poetry cassanova?
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