Thursday, March 16, 2006
Alternative Surgery |1:41 PM| Yesterday was my 90 day review, a wee bit late. It went tremendously well, and though I couldn't be given a raise until December (corporate policy), my boss arranged for me to get a bonus.
This is incredible, I've never gotten a bonus after a review, even after terrific ones.
I wonder how my boss would react if he knew I spent a good portion of the cash on replacement bars for my nipple piercings. Newer metal, with less nickel, and a bit longer. A day later and I can already tell the difference.
But enough about nipples, especially un-exciting male ones.
I was discussing airline safety concerns with a friend the other day, and I brought up that there are cases where you'd want a knife or blade on the plane, such as emergency tracheotomies. Granted, this is not a common concern on a plane, but if a medical professional says "Great, I need a hole in this dude's throat because I can't get that ping pong ball out. If he goes without oxygen much longer he'll be even dumber than when he started.", it probably has to happen in a hurry.
Thing is, he'll have better luck gnawing a hole into the dude's windpipe than he will using what few simple tools he'll be able to fashion on board. Conceivably, he could break the glass on a laptop screen and do that, just be careful of the mercury.
It was brought up that there might be air marshals on the plane, and that they will have guns. It would take some pretty intensive training to be able to use the ceramic bullets those guns fire to poke an air passage through a guy's neck. "Sir? Sir? I need you to lie PERFECTLY still."
I could certainly see some adaptations of this for emergency appendectomies as well.
Alternative Surgery |1:41 PM| Yesterday was my 90 day review, a wee bit late. It went tremendously well, and though I couldn't be given a raise until December (corporate policy), my boss arranged for me to get a bonus.
This is incredible, I've never gotten a bonus after a review, even after terrific ones.
I wonder how my boss would react if he knew I spent a good portion of the cash on replacement bars for my nipple piercings. Newer metal, with less nickel, and a bit longer. A day later and I can already tell the difference.
But enough about nipples, especially un-exciting male ones.
I was discussing airline safety concerns with a friend the other day, and I brought up that there are cases where you'd want a knife or blade on the plane, such as emergency tracheotomies. Granted, this is not a common concern on a plane, but if a medical professional says "Great, I need a hole in this dude's throat because I can't get that ping pong ball out. If he goes without oxygen much longer he'll be even dumber than when he started.", it probably has to happen in a hurry.
Thing is, he'll have better luck gnawing a hole into the dude's windpipe than he will using what few simple tools he'll be able to fashion on board. Conceivably, he could break the glass on a laptop screen and do that, just be careful of the mercury.
It was brought up that there might be air marshals on the plane, and that they will have guns. It would take some pretty intensive training to be able to use the ceramic bullets those guns fire to poke an air passage through a guy's neck. "Sir? Sir? I need you to lie PERFECTLY still."
I could certainly see some adaptations of this for emergency appendectomies as well.
3 Comments:
I personally find male nipples very exciting.
Very.
Then again, bonuses are exciting too. Hooray for bonuses!
By 
, at
11:29 PM
you could go Red Pony and do it with a pen.
By , at
2:11 PM
Red Pony?
OH. You meant Red Eye.
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