Thursday, March 31, 2005
Cars and shorts |4:11 PM| “Hi, this is _______ equipment supply, how can I help you?”
Me: “Hello. I don’t want to be a..uh tattle tale, but one of your vehicles, he’s driving like a luna… I mean a bit aggressively.”
“Oh? What kind of car was it?”
”It was a pickup, I didn’t catch the plate number, but the back is covered in NASCAR stickers and numbers.”
“A truck? Not a van?”
“Definitely a truck, with a giant sump pump on the back.”
“Hmm. My boss is on the line with someone else saying the same thing, hold for a second…”
And then I repeated my story, saying how this white pickup was tailgating, weaving from lane to lane, and driving like a maniac. I succeeded in keeping a variety of curse words out of my description, despite the driver’s notable asshole-ness. Though I felt a little bit of snitch-shame, I’m pretty sure the boss took it seriously, and the guy was being a total dick. With any luck that wanna-be NASCAR driver is looking for new work.
Speaking of pickup trucks, I was walking to my apartment the other day, and there was an extremely attractive woman of about my age, struggling with boxes in her truck. Her tanktop/shorts combo suggested either a lot of planned work in the sun, or advertisement of skin. Anyhow, I would normally offer to help just about anyone who needed it, but I hesitated due to her attractiveness. I assumed that she would assume that I would be helping just for the chance to see her take the tanktop/shorts off. Now, I’m not going to deny that helping someone who is easy on the eyes doesn’t offer a slight bonus to the ego above helping the two middle aged women on the highway ramp or similar cases. However, I would think that my history shows me to be a helpful passerby, and a faithful boyfriend.
I need a permit or a license that says “Not a total creep-show” with a list of previous acts of helpfulness, and a signed certificate from my girlfriend that says “Nice guy”.
Anyhow, I ended up offering help to the young woman, and she politely declined. There were a lot of reasons to decline the help, so it’s very possible she didn’t assume I was a hooligan.
Or maybe my girlfriend was right and my sunglasses make me look evil.
Cars and shorts |4:11 PM| “Hi, this is _______ equipment supply, how can I help you?”
Me: “Hello. I don’t want to be a..uh tattle tale, but one of your vehicles, he’s driving like a luna… I mean a bit aggressively.”
“Oh? What kind of car was it?”
”It was a pickup, I didn’t catch the plate number, but the back is covered in NASCAR stickers and numbers.”
“A truck? Not a van?”
“Definitely a truck, with a giant sump pump on the back.”
“Hmm. My boss is on the line with someone else saying the same thing, hold for a second…”
And then I repeated my story, saying how this white pickup was tailgating, weaving from lane to lane, and driving like a maniac. I succeeded in keeping a variety of curse words out of my description, despite the driver’s notable asshole-ness. Though I felt a little bit of snitch-shame, I’m pretty sure the boss took it seriously, and the guy was being a total dick. With any luck that wanna-be NASCAR driver is looking for new work.
Speaking of pickup trucks, I was walking to my apartment the other day, and there was an extremely attractive woman of about my age, struggling with boxes in her truck. Her tanktop/shorts combo suggested either a lot of planned work in the sun, or advertisement of skin. Anyhow, I would normally offer to help just about anyone who needed it, but I hesitated due to her attractiveness. I assumed that she would assume that I would be helping just for the chance to see her take the tanktop/shorts off. Now, I’m not going to deny that helping someone who is easy on the eyes doesn’t offer a slight bonus to the ego above helping the two middle aged women on the highway ramp or similar cases. However, I would think that my history shows me to be a helpful passerby, and a faithful boyfriend.
I need a permit or a license that says “Not a total creep-show” with a list of previous acts of helpfulness, and a signed certificate from my girlfriend that says “Nice guy”.
Anyhow, I ended up offering help to the young woman, and she politely declined. There were a lot of reasons to decline the help, so it’s very possible she didn’t assume I was a hooligan.
Or maybe my girlfriend was right and my sunglasses make me look evil.
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