Friday, April 30, 2004
Anger Cycle |9:54 PM| My body is eating itself from the inside out, as I seem to have developed an ulcer. How cliche.
A couple days ago, due to drug side effects apparently, I was intensely angry in an unfocused fashion. Drivers on the road made me nearly go insane, being out of orange juice in my house built up rage inside. I knew at the time it was stupid and a chemical issue, but I still managed to get so angry that my stomach started hurting. No matter, I thought, it'll go away soon.
It didn't go away for several hours after I had calmed down. A churning, burning feeling in my stomach.
Days later (as in, yesterday) several events came together to make me as angry as I've felt in a long damned time. The power was cut off early, the was a previous balance I had to pay, the goddamn robot was apparently sent off to la-la land, and some other crap. What's important is I was so damned angry that the feeling in my pit came back, almost painful enough to incapacitate me. Luckily I had Akido class to calm down, but for long after (well into today) my stomach was churning and painful. I began belching violently this morning and didn't stop completely until now.
I'm calling the Doc as soon as possible. But now I can't get angry or it hurts, which pisses me off, which hurts, which pisses me off. I have to spend a lot of time on the phone chanting to myself "Don't get pissed, don't get pissed..."
This blows.
Anger Cycle |9:54 PM| My body is eating itself from the inside out, as I seem to have developed an ulcer. How cliche.
A couple days ago, due to drug side effects apparently, I was intensely angry in an unfocused fashion. Drivers on the road made me nearly go insane, being out of orange juice in my house built up rage inside. I knew at the time it was stupid and a chemical issue, but I still managed to get so angry that my stomach started hurting. No matter, I thought, it'll go away soon.
It didn't go away for several hours after I had calmed down. A churning, burning feeling in my stomach.
Days later (as in, yesterday) several events came together to make me as angry as I've felt in a long damned time. The power was cut off early, the was a previous balance I had to pay, the goddamn robot was apparently sent off to la-la land, and some other crap. What's important is I was so damned angry that the feeling in my pit came back, almost painful enough to incapacitate me. Luckily I had Akido class to calm down, but for long after (well into today) my stomach was churning and painful. I began belching violently this morning and didn't stop completely until now.
I'm calling the Doc as soon as possible. But now I can't get angry or it hurts, which pisses me off, which hurts, which pisses me off. I have to spend a lot of time on the phone chanting to myself "Don't get pissed, don't get pissed..."
This blows.
Labels: Drugs
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