Tuesday, November 13, 2001
|1:27 AM|
I read the CNN coverage on the plane, and found out it was random horrible tradgedy, as oppossed to directed horror. I find I am not very comforted by the idea since both seem so possible nowadays. I can't say that I am filled with fear, I'm just a simple creature trying to figure out which way to swivel my head and hope there is a tree nearby. I clip my fingernails, and I file them. Then I work on the cuticles, and I re-file the ends. I was never taught how to take care of my nails, I just keep this little kit with me for nail maitenance. It's almost like a security blanket. In the scheme of things, the length of my toenails and fingernails mean about as little as could possibly be, but a simple act that I taught myself is comforting. Damn, clipped my thumb too close. I should have someone who knows something about finger maintanence teach me.

I'm going on for line after line about my fucking fingers. I worked with someone who was on flight 800, all those years ago. I wouldn't have know if an educational fund hadn't been set up. I don't want to go back to feeling "safe and secure", when we really don't seem to be. I still think I should know where the possible threats are coming from. I'm still going to fly, I'm still going to check my mail in the morning. The kind of random, sudden nature of it all is not something you can predict, only prepare for. I'll just do my best to keep living and appreciating what I have and what I could have.



0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Archives
07/15/2001", "07/29/2001", "08/12/2001", "08/19/2001", "08/26/2001", "09/23/2001", "09/30/2001", "10/07/2001", "10/14/2001", "10/21/2001", "10/28/2001", "11/04/2001", "11/11/2001", "11/18/2001", "11/25/2001", "12/02/2001", "12/09/2001", "12/16/2001", "12/23/2001", "12/30/2001", "01/06/2002", "01/13/2002", "01/20/2002", "01/27/2002", "02/03/2002", "02/10/2002", "02/17/2002", "02/24/2002", "03/03/2002", "03/10/2002", "03/17/2002", "03/24/2002", "03/31/2002", "04/07/2002", "04/14/2002", "04/21/2002", "04/28/2002", "05/05/2002", "05/12/2002", "05/19/2002", "05/26/2002", "06/02/2002", "06/09/2002", "06/16/2002", "06/23/2002", "06/30/2002", "07/07/2002", "07/14/2002", "07/21/2002", "07/28/2002", "08/04/2002", "08/11/2002", "08/18/2002", "08/25/2002", "09/01/2002", "09/08/2002", "09/15/2002", "09/22/2002", "09/29/2002", "10/06/2002", "10/13/2002", "10/20/2002", "10/27/2002", "11/03/2002", "11/10/2002", "11/17/2002", "11/24/2002", "12/01/2002", "01/05/2003", "01/12/2003", "01/19/2003", "01/26/2003", "02/02/2003", "02/09/2003", "02/16/2003", "02/23/2003", "03/02/2003", "03/09/2003", "03/16/2003", "03/23/2003", "03/30/2003", "04/06/2003", "04/13/2003", "04/20/2003", "04/27/2003", "05/04/2003", "05/11/2003", "05/18/2003", "05/25/2003", "06/01/2003", "06/08/2003", "06/15/2003", "06/22/2003", "06/29/2003", "07/06/2003", "07/13/2003", "07/20/2003", "07/27/2003", "08/03/2003", "08/10/2003", "08/24/2003", "09/07/2003", "09/14/2003", "10/12/2003", "10/19/2003", "10/26/2003", "12/07/2003", "12/14/2003", "12/21/2003", "12/28/2003", "01/11/2004", "01/18/2004", "01/25/2004", "02/01/2004", "02/08/2004", "02/15/2004", "02/22/2004", "02/29/2004", "03/07/2004", "03/14/2004", "03/21/2004", "03/28/2004", "04/04/2004", "04/11/2004", "04/18/2004", "04/25/2004", "05/02/2004", "05/09/2004", "05/16/2004", "05/23/2004", "05/30/2004", "06/06/2004", "06/13/2004", "06/20/2004", "06/27/2004", "07/04/2004", "07/11/2004", "07/18/2004", "07/25/2004", "08/01/2004", "08/08/2004", "08/15/2004", "08/22/2004", "08/29/2004", "09/05/2004", "09/19/2004", "09/26/2004", "10/03/2004", "10/10/2004", "10/17/2004", "10/24/2004", "10/31/2004", "11/07/2004", "11/14/2004", "11/21/2004", "11/28/2004", "12/05/2004", "12/12/2004", "01/16/2005", "01/30/2005", "02/20/2005", "02/27/2005", "03/06/2005", "03/13/2005", "03/27/2005", "04/10/2005", "04/17/2005", "04/24/2005", "05/01/2005", "05/08/2005", "05/15/2005", "05/22/2005", "07/03/2005", "07/10/2005", "07/24/2005", "07/31/2005", "09/18/2005", "12/11/2005", "12/18/2005", "12/25/2005", "01/01/2006", "01/08/2006", "02/26/2006", "03/05/2006", "03/12/2006", "03/19/2006", "03/26/2006", "04/02/2006", "04/09/2006", "04/16/2006", "04/23/2006", "05/28/2006", "10/08/2006", "11/05/2006", "11/12/2006", "11/19/2006", "11/26/2006", "12/10/2006", "12/17/2006", "12/24/2006", "12/31/2006", "01/07/2007", "01/14/2007", "01/21/2007", "01/28/2007", "02/04/2007", "02/11/2007", "02/18/2007", "02/25/2007", "03/04/2007", "03/11/2007", "03/18/2007", "03/25/2007", "04/01/2007", "04/08/2007", "04/15/2007", "04/22/2007", "04/29/2007", "05/06/2007", "05/13/2007", "05/20/2007", "06/03/2007", "06/10/2007", "06/17/2007", "06/24/2007", "07/01/2007", "07/08/2007", "07/15/2007", "07/22/2007", "07/29/2007", "08/05/2007", "08/19/2007", "08/26/2007", "09/02/2007", "09/09/2007", "09/16/2007", "09/30/2007", "10/07/2007", "10/14/2007", "10/21/2007", "10/28/2007", "11/25/2007", "12/02/2007", "12/09/2007", "12/16/2007", "01/13/2008", "01/20/2008", "02/10/2008", "02/17/2008", "03/09/2008", "03/30/2008", "05/11/2008", "05/18/2008", "05/25/2008", "06/01/2008", "06/08/2008", "06/15/2008", "06/22/2008", "06/29/2008", "07/06/2008", "07/13/2008", "07/20/2008", "07/27/2008", "08/10/2008", "11/08/2009", ); //Pulls stuff out from the given string (assuming it is the right length) //51 places in should be the year. function ExtractYear($WholeDateString) { ////String extract the first part, up until 60 $StringYear = substr($WholeDateString, 60); ///extract everything before the _ $StringYear = strtok($StringYear, "_"); return $StringYear; } function ExtractMonth($WholeURlMonth) { /////Extract the month $WholeURlMonth = substr($WholeURlMonth, 65); $WholeURlMonth = strtok($WholeURlMonth, "_"); return $WholeURlMonth; } function ExtractWeek($WholeURLWeek) { /////Extract the week, which will be the title of each link $WholeURLWeek = substr($URLWeek, 81); $WholeURLWeek = strtok($URLWeek, "<"); echo $WholeURLWeek; } $MyDateArray = array('01' => 'January', '02' => 'February', '03' => 'March', '04' => 'April', '05' => 'May', '06' => 'June', '07' => 'July', '08' => 'August', '09' => 'September', '10' => 'October', '11' => 'November', '12' => 'December'); ///Extract ///$StringMonth /////We need to know which DIV we're in. We need one created for the years, and then the months. The months are the /////tricky ones, since they need their ID to increase more than the years, but since the functions keep referencing ///// the same name system, we have to be careful not to make the years close up when we click on a month. ///Set some Variables $YearMenuID = 1; /////What ID the preceding year link controls. Needs to be same for all the months under a given year. $MonthMenuID= 1; ////What ID the preceding month link controls. Needs to be the same for all the weeks under a given ////Month but not the same as any year, etc. $LastYearUsed = 0; $LastMonthUsed = 0; echo '
'; /////That should be the "Year" div. All the years should be in this one DIV. ///Start the main loop. foreach ($myDateArray as $key => $value) { ////Pulling the year/date. $month = ExtractMonth($value); $year = ExtractYear($value); $YearMenuID = $year; $MonthMenuID = $month; $PrettyMonth = $MyDateArray[$month]; ////Is this a new year? If ($year != $LastYearUsed) ///Then we need to put the year down. No DIV created quite yet. { ///First off, we need to close the preceding year's DIV. Twice if it ain't 2001 if ($year != 2001) { echo '
'; } echo '
'; //That should close up the previous year. ///Say this is the swap from 2001 to 2002, that should close up the 2001 links. ///Problem is, we also need to close up the final month links too. /// echo '
'; //We Need to set the $YearMenuID $YearMenuID = $year; $MonthMenuID = $month; ///Now it should be different than other menu items, but the same for all parts of this //year's DIV. ///This all needs to be in HTML. print<<<_HTML1_

$year

_HTML1_; ///Okay, so now we have a year link that controls...nothing. We need to create a DIV ///For it to control. Since this is the first year, We also need the first month to be put down, no matter ///what. ///So a DIV for all the months is needed. print<<<_HTML2_
View My Stats -->